The Number You Have Dialed Is Not in Service
$uicideboy$ Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴I'm fallin' apart
You mighta thought I was playin'
A part in the art I've created
But most of the words reflect what's happened
Or what is waitin' to start happenin'
I keep on damagin' myself
Tryna fill the void with all this water round my neck
I'm 'bout to drip until I drown All these drugs up in my nose
I taste the drip, that shit's so sour
All these cars that I bought
Either don't start or they got impounded
Pursued the American dream
The nightmare's what I doubted
Catch a flight to London or I'll catch I flight to Lyon
Show my face in public, show another one at home
See my name on the marquee, letters fallin' down
Litterin' a cold dark street somewhere downtown
As soon as I reached cloud nine it started stormin'
Heavy thunderstorms in every city that I'm tourin'
Life ain't like a rap video, that's just a warnin'
Hopin' to see the sun when I wake up in the mornin'

All this misery, misery, misery, fuck
Look at my history, no mystery
Where I might end up, just shut up
Don't wanna hear it, it's my decision
May be my last wish so just please listen (not in service)
So long, it's been torture bein' here
So cold, gettin' high but now I cope with fear
Same song and I'm sick of singin' it
Let me move on, it's for my benefit
But one come all to my downfall
Bear witness to everything that I can't solve
My therapist made me promise before I end it all
That her phone would be the one I choose to call, cryin', askin'
Is it really worth it?
What's beneath the surface or behind the curtain?
Really don't think I wanna take this any further
Made one last attempt to figure out my purpose
I called her phone, it said, "Not in service"

When life gets hard (get's hard)
Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)
Even if the finish line is far
Or you have to push the car (push the car)
Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)

When life gets hard (get's hard)
Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)
Even if the finish line is far

Or you have to push the car (push the car)
Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)

Overall Meaning

$uicideboy$'s song "The Number You Have Dialed Is Not in Service" is a poignant portrayal of the depressive thoughts and feelings that can engulf someone's mind. The lyrics are introspective and provide an insight into the situation that many people face on their lives where they feel isolated and hopeless. The opening line, "I'm fallin' apart" sets the tone for the song and it is clear that the singer is struggling with their own identity and their place in the world.

The line, "All these cars that I bought, either don't start or they got impounded" is a metaphor for the singer's life. Everything they have, doesn't work or has been taken away from them. They feel that they have been pursuing the American dream but have reached a nightmare instead. The chorus "When life gets hard (get's hard), keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)" provides a moment of hope in the song. It encourages individuals to keep going even in the face of adversity.

The singer ultimately decides to call their therapist before ending it all, but the therapist's phone went out of service. This ending leaves the listener to wonder if they did go through with it, what the real consequences of their decisions are. Overall, the song is a reflection on the struggles of life and the importance of seeking help when needed.

Line by Line Meaning

I'm fallin' apart
I cannot handle my emotions and mental state

You mighta thought I was playin'
My struggles might seem like a joke to others

A part in the art I've created
My music is a reflection of my experiences and emotions

But most of the words reflect what's happened
My lyrics are based on my past experiences and current struggles

Or what is waitin' to start happenin'
I fear what the future holds

I keep on damagin' myself
I continue to harm myself mentally and physically

Tryna fill the void with all this water round my neck
I'm trying to cope with my problems using drugs and alcohol

I'm 'bout to drip until I drown
My drug use is getting out of control and may lead to my downfall

All these drugs up in my nose
I'm addicted to drugs and it's affecting my health

I taste the drip, that shit's so sour
The taste of drugs is unpleasant

All these cars that I bought
I have material possessions, but they are useless

Either don't start or they got impounded
My possessions are falling apart and being taken away

Pursued the American dream
I chased the idea of success and wealth

The nightmare's what I doubted
The reality of the American Dream is not what I expected

Catch a flight to London or I'll catch I flight to Lyon
I'm constantly traveling, but it doesn't bring me happiness

Show my face in public, show another one at home
I'm living a double life and hiding my true self

See my name on the marquee, letters fallin' down
I see my name in lights, but it doesn't bring me satisfaction

Litterin' a cold dark street somewhere downtown
My fame and fortune have led me to a lonely and dark place

As soon as I reached cloud nine it started stormin'
When I experience happiness, it is immediately followed by sadness

Heavy thunderstorms in every city that I'm tourin'
My problems follow me no matter where I go

Life ain't like a rap video, that's just a warnin'
Life is not as glamorous as it seems in music videos

Hopin' to see the sun when I wake up in the mornin'
I'm hoping for a better tomorrow

All this misery, misery, misery, fuck
My life is full of pain and I'm fed up with it

Look at my history, no mystery
My problems are a result of my past experiences

Where I might end up, just shut up
I'm unsure of what the future holds and I don't want to hear pessimistic comments

Don't wanna hear it, it's my decision
I don't need someone else telling me how to live my life

May be my last wish so just please listen (not in service)
I may be suicidal and am calling out for help, but it may be too late

So long, it's been torture bein' here
My life has been a painful experience

So cold, gettin' high but now I cope with fear
I used to cope with my problems using drugs, but now I'm scared

Same song and I'm sick of singin' it
I'm tired of living the same repetitive life

Let me move on, it's for my benefit
Moving on from my problems is the only way to improve my life

But one come all to my downfall
Everyone is watching and waiting for me to fail

Bear witness to everything that I can't solve
Everyone is aware of my problems, but I can't fix them

My therapist made me promise before I end it all
I'm seeing a therapist and they made me promise to call them before attempting suicide

That her phone would be the one I choose to call, cryin', askin'
I will call my therapist in a moment of desperation

Is it really worth it?
My suicidal thoughts are making me question the value of life

What's beneath the surface or behind the curtain?
I want to understand the root of my problems

Really don't think I wanna take this any further
I'm on the brink of giving up on life

Made one last attempt to figure out my purpose
I'm trying to find meaning in my life before giving up

I called her phone, it said, "Not in service"
My therapist is not there to help me and I feel helpless

When life gets hard (get's hard)
When life gets difficult

Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)
Keep moving forward

Even if the finish line is far
Even if the end goal is far away

Or you have to push the car (push the car)
Even if it takes a lot of effort

Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)
Keep moving forward

When life gets hard (get's hard)
When life gets difficult

Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)
Keep moving forward

Even if the finish line is far
Even if the end goal is far away

Or you have to push the car (push the car)
Even if it takes a lot of effort

Keep on marchin' on (keep on marchin' on)
Keep moving forward

Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
Written by: Aristos Petrou, Scott Arceneaux

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind

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